So, what's the honest answer? Once, twice, three times? Or... is it too many times to possibly count?
Unfortunately, the last answer would be my honest answer.
And no, I'm not talking about cheating on exams and the sort... well, even if I did, you would never know and I would never tell.
AHEM. Well, no one's perfect yeah? :p
Okay, so what am I talking about here? I am talking about cheating on your gluten free diet.
Cheating, in this case, is purposefully breaking the strict oath you have taken as a gfreer to not consume any gluten containing products or use any dishes/utensils that have potential cross contamination and suffering the consequences afterward.
Why in the world would anyone want to do that and risk their health??
That's actually a really good question to which I have some viable answers:
First of all, no gfreer wants to be the spotlight of your dinner party/gathering with food. We can't help awkwardly standing out already since we have a restricted diet- yep, we're the ones analyzing the potluck food asking questions about what's in the sauce and holding up the line. <--I'm reallllyy good at that! But, hey sometimes, we cheat. And by cheat I mean if a food looks essentially gluten free except for maybe the sauce, some of us will eat it. I do. Sometimes I feel sick afterward, sometimes I have no reaction. It's really up to my GI tract's mood. The main point is, we do it to fit in. Which brings me to my next point...
Sometimes us gfreers find ourselves in a situation where the words "celiac disease" and "gluten" are non-existent. This has happened to me quite a few times when I eat at Asian restaurants or when I travel to Asian countries. NOBODY, and I repeat, NOBODY will know what you are talking about when you say you get stomach aches when you eat gluten. And although I could give them one of those nifty gfree dining cards, I bet you 10 million (well, if I had that much) that they would give me the wtf face and turn me away. So, what do I do? I cheat. I eat the stuff that's coated with soy sauce (although I try realllly hard to dip it in tea or wipe it off with a napkin before pushing it in my mouth). I eat gluten when I have no other choice. I eat it when it would be rude not to and when I'm not in the position to be making demands for food preparation. I do it so I seem like everyone else and not labeled as a "picky eater."
I guess it can be difficult for those outside of the celiac circle to fully understand the plights of the gfreer, but I'm not expecting them to know everything there is to know about celiac disease and gluten. Although, if you make an honest and sincere effort to learn about it, let's just say that I will regard you highly. In other words, let's be best friends!! :)
You know, one of the things I have learned since being on the diet is to be as accommodating and polite as possible while trying my best not to jeopardize my health and well being. One exposure to gluten, depending on the sensitivity of the individual, can take weeks or years to heal. I know that very well, yet I still do it.
At the end of the day, it's impossible for me to be entirely gluten free unless I live in a cave (aka my apartment) and cook for myself all the time and never go out to eat... ever. And if I did, I would be the weirdo who would whip out some Tupperware, dump it on my plate and call it a day. Heck, maybe I'd eat right out of the container.
Okay, mayyybe I wouldn't do that. At least not in public. The reality? I'd suggest a change of venue or eat beforehand and suggest a safe dessert place.
Ahh, the subtle ways us gfreers can manipulate food choices!
Anyway, stay safe all you gfreers out there- make good choices and don't use me as a role model in this case. Everything else nice and good about my habits you can take, but do me a favor and leave my cheating habits behind if you can.
After all, no one likes a cheater!
-Kris
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